Pope Francis attributes two miracles to John Paul 11, clears the path to sainthood

John Paul 11. Soon to be saint

by Richard Mellor

Pope Francis has gone ahead and authorized the Vatican to make former pope, John Paul 11 a saint the BBC reported today.  The move is due to Francis attributing a second miracle to John Paul, a bit like a second degree black belt in Karate. This means John Paul can move up to the Canonization procedure which is the final step in this process.

With two miracles, John Paul goes one up on pope John the XX111, but Francis decided to authorize sainthood for John as well.  John Paul has been on the “fast track” to sainthood the BBC reports and a lot of that has to do with him helping bring down communism.

All major news outlets from Reuters to CNN have announced the news, “An "inexplicable recovery" on the very day of John Paul II's beatification has been assessed as a miracle by the Vatican's saint-making department…”  the BBC states on its website.

These are supposedly serious news outlets.  A story like this might be OK in the Onion but to actually report this and give it credibility is something else.  One has to laugh at this, but it is an example of the important role that the media and religious superstition plays in society. The Vatican City news agency doesn’t say what these miracles are but in John Paul’s case, an “inexplicable recovery” occurred as the process to sainting him was moving along.

What gets me is how come only Catholics get to be saints.  How come Einstein couldn’t be a saint or Malcolm X? What about Albert Schweitzer?  He cured a lot of people, sure with scientific methods but can't that count?  Why does god only allow Catholics to perform miracles like waking dead people or curing bone marrow cancer just by thinking about it? And James Connolly?  He was a Catholic? What about Edward Snowden, or Bradley Manning, they deserve to be a saints for the good they've done.

And another thing I’m a bit peeved about is favoritism. I went to a school named after a guy named George Napier. I don’t know who he was but he is a blessed, the name of the school was Blessed George. You see, before you become a saint you are a “blessed.” until they can find one of the miracles you might have performed.  I haven’t been to that school in over 50 years and Napier is still a blessed as far as I know; there’s some shenanigans going on here.  It’s just not fair. I hate to say it but it seems a bit like nepotism too, I make the last guy in my job a saint when he dies and it increases my chances when I'm dead.

The Vatican is an institution of capitalism, perhaps one of the most powerful and influential of them.  Like all religious institutions it defends the free market and capitalism vehemently as it assigns greed and selfishness to us all, billionaires and starving peasants alike.  “We’re all god’s children” you see.  The other “official” reason for global poverty, starvation and war is that we are all sinners.  This is due to the fact (yes a fact) that all humans are born with this sin that I recall being called “original sin”. Original sin is the first sin and that according to the Vatican: 

“originated from Adam and Eve disobeying God's commandment, choosing to follow their own will and introducing sin into the world. Original sin describes the subsequent fallen state of human nature.”
Yes, we’re living in the 21^st century and one of the powerful and richest institutions of the ruling class perpetuates this stuff; it’s very useful keeping people in the dark. It does explain though why there are no women allowed to make saints or hang out at the Vatican let alone become pope who is actually gods representative on earth.  It was Eve who tricked, cajoled and seduced poor old Adam in to thinking for himself. 

That's it then, women are the problem. Except for my mum.